Why do I always find myself with boys that are simply playing games.
I’m so sick of being a convenient casualty.
My heart is weary from the endless lies and the empty kisses.
Will I ever be enough?
Beginning to think I am deceiving myself into believing there still is hope.
Do I really make it that easy to walk in and out of my life, to seduce me and conquer me. On your conquest to deduce me to tears, did you ever wonder what it would be like to just love me?
I am confident that I don’t want to know the answer to that question.
I just want to curl up in a ball and die in this overwhelming and heartbreaking loneliness that crowns me…
What a horrible emptiness I harbor in my heart. I give so much of myself to please others. Sacrifice my time, my energy, my emotions and feelings. Ever pouring my heart into the hearts of others. Always hoping for reciprocation yet only finding my glass getting less full. I honestly don’t even know what I should even do anymore. I just feel like counting the moments while watching the clock and waiting for time to stop. Waiting for it all to stop. To stop feeling. To stop loving. To stop hurting. To stop breathing.
I think I have exhausted all my options when it comes to finding any happiness through a long term relationship with a male.
So I’m always falling…