what a monumental level of disappointment I have reached knowing that you have replaced me with a younger boy.
in his eyes I see my haunted reflection.
a tragic mirror image of all I had to offer.
all the desperate emotions that went ignored are now trapped beneath his ironically similar golden brown skin.
the pain and sorrow I felt from your sheer neglect is trapped in his brittle little bones, growing like a terminal cancer.
his pure heart will soon be black and hollow as mine as he rots from the inside just as I did.
each time you were inside me I died a little more, shuttered in delight as you let your poison dissipate deep within.
my body, an empty shell writhing in ecstasy as you used me.
I look at him and see his pretty bones and know your carnality will devour him whole.
and somehow I know that you are going to give him all the things I ever wanted, all the things I have never received.
his beautiful corpse breeds envy in my hollow heart because for some reason I know that you are going to love him instead of destroy him.
and now I lay in bed, in defeat, like the rubble of a conquered castle.
weary with wonder and despair.
and now I am simply the dust, ashes and bone that you couldn’t find use for in your life.
smoldering unattended for the rest of eternity bitter and alone.